I don’t want to live And I don’t want to die I’m killing myself With self-hate and lies I’ve been so alone Saw no one else here Been so alone That I had nothing to fear But you gave me hope Believed in my dreams And I took it all in me Unwise as it now seems ‘Cause the dreams disappeared Each time you saw away Like you couldn’t keep your promises And make the dreams stay
I don’t want to live And I don’t want to die My dreams are hiding A place much much too high You made me a dreamer But I am a naive and foolish one Now too much a dreamer To see reality beyond But a dreamer without dreams Is like laying in the grave You must bring them back Aren’t they worth to save? You believed in them Or was it just a lie? I love you too much So don’t let me die!
Sometimes ‘sorry’ isn’t good enough It’s just a word to say when you don’t know what else to do But what can I do with your words When my words can’t get through to you?
Sometimes I just need you to hold me Hold me tight like you never let me go I want to be the only one for you But there are many others, I know
Sometimes I fear the future Will it be alone, or will it be with you I know I must forgive the past But how? Please tell me what to do
Sometimes I cry lonely tears I wonder why ‘cause you are near Or is it just my imagination? Perhaps the truth is what I fear?
Sometimes ‘sorry’ can’t heal my heart I try to forgive but don’t know what to do ‘Cause I don’t trust you anymore Though I love you, why can’t you love me too?
Why does my inner child still believe she is apart? And looks for that someone with the key to her heart? That lost little girl just waiting for you to take her hand Believes she can’t survive if she on her own has to stand
But what that little girl just don’t catch Is that no one outside has a key that’s a match All along, I have been the one holding the key The love she longs for is inside of me!
I have to realise that you are way too much in fear The games your mind play mean you can’t have me near I appreciate ‘our space’ but know I have to let you go I have to find my strength, that I to my own heart owe
I owe my heart to be with ‘you’ Who can love me so fully all my patterns undo Who can be authentic, distinguishable from the ‘coof’ A grownup manifesting the love of truth!
Until the day ‘you’ will appear I’ll love my heart and all its fear I’ll be the wholeness of a burning presence For ‘you’ to appear in the light of my essence
Then we can flow into the play of love Manifesting qualities from high above The light will shine through me, and I’ll know I’m not lost Being true to my heart no matter the cost!
I am sorry for leaving you I didn’t know any better But I am here for you now I will not judge you, Ignore you Project on to you, like they do!
I will thank them and let them be So I can take care of what’s in me You, my dear, my sweet innocent child I’ll never leave you again So much hurt I caused, you had to flee!
Forgive me, dear child, I was lost But I’m coming home now I’ll hold you, love, and protect you You’re no longer threatened on your survival My flight has had too high a cost!
Now rest peacefully in my presence This is a new beginning I am no longer lost in the world You, my dear, are my light shining bright You are my joy and my essence!
It is time to laugh, play and be My inner child, I am here now I am home again to stay The nightmare is over You are finally free!
Heartlight Poetry 