Original artwork, Original poetry

Fear

I’m so tired I could cry
I’m so hurt by your denial
Hurt ‘cause you didn’t see the tear in my eye?
Tired because my dreams are flying too high?

Oh, I’m so lonely here with you
I don’t know what I want you to do
I don’t know what I am doing wrong
And how I can keep going on being strong?

I’m stressed ‘cause of fear
And I can’t have you near
Have to live life on my own
With you, you know, I’m too alone…

Have fantasies of us together alone in a prison cell
And where the key is only I can tell
Maybe then you can see my tear
Maybe then I can accept my fear?

Maybe then I can let you come near
And you and I will become so clear
I will be awake all life long
And have no fear of going on…

(This poem is from an old collection of mine. It was written in 2003 and was the last poem written in my youth (from 1998-2003). Originally the drawing had a title ”Why don’t you want me?”, which reflected the deep feeling of neglect and loneliness I experienced through my youth).

© 2022 Original painting and poetry by heartlight.blog. All rights reserved.

Original artwork, Original poetry

Much Further Out

I am much further out
Than you think
So you don’t save me

Only remember the
Good times we had
Can you blame me

For wanting more
Than what we had?

Don’t want to slip away
From the land that is you

Please save me
From the river storms
Before I reach the ocean

Help me
Make the Angry thunder
Quiet

So I can sleep
Safely in your arms again

So I can cry
Without being taken away

From the land
That is you

I am much further out
Than you think
But I guess there’s still time

If I can just stop blaming me
For all the lives I’ve killed
On my river ride

And stop blaming you
For not seeing what’s behind!

(This poem is from an old collection of mine. It was written in 2003 and was the last poem written in my youth (from 1998-2003). Originally the drawing had a title ”Why don’t you want me?”, which reflected the deep feeling of neglect and loneliness I experienced through my youth).

© 2022 Original painting and poetry by heartlight.blog. All rights reserved.

Original artwork, Original poetry

Chain of pain

Loved one, you see
My truth is never to hide
You can see and feel
All that I have inside…

Why should I pretend
My heart is free
When I know the chain of pain
Will never let me be?

I’d love to embrace
You had me opened
Give you my heart
I just fear it is broken…

So frightened I am
Life is so hard to go through
Staying strong and fearless
And staying true…

I feel like crying
When you are not near
So can you heal my heart
Help mending my fear?

Loved one, do you see
I’m trying to break the chain
I want to live life near you
I’d like to let go of the pain…

(This poem is from an old collection of mine. It was written in 2003 and was the last poem written in my youth (from 1998-2003). Originally the drawing had a title ”Why don’t you want me?”, which reflected the deep feeling of neglect and loneliness I experienced through my youth).

© 2022 Original painting and poetry by heartlight.blog. All rights reserved.

Original artwork, Original poetry

Next time

Next time
I’ll stand naked before your eyes
Vulnerable and strong
Have no more room for hidden cries!

An old picture changed
I couldn’t stand the pain
Through it way…

I can’t stand this pain
Put me in my old chain
If just you hadn’t asked me home
Then I wouldn’t have had to see my picture
In a brand-new frame…

I can’t take this fame!
I’m a master at this game…

But next time
I’ll stand naked before your eyes
Vulnerable and strong
I’ll end this game revealing my cries!

No more lies, no more cries
I’ll leave this game
Forget my fame…

Free from pain!

(This poem is from an old collection of mine. It was written in 2003 and was the last poem written in my youth (from 1998-2003). Originally the drawing had a title ”Why don’t you want me?”, which reflected the deep feeling of neglect and loneliness I experienced through my youth).

© 2022 Original painting and poetry by heartlight.blog. All rights reserved.