Lonely heart let’s go back to the start
Before all we did were searching
For signs of life on the outside
Even though we knew he had been dead for years
We were traumatised by what we relived but revised
Starting fresh would have to mean progress
Letting go of all the old memories of pain
The stories of hurt and abandonment
To live in ‘the Now’ we must find a way to
Abolish projection and judgement
And surrender to all that there are
Though his absence is constantly paining us
It points to the core of our trauma
Constantly looking for him to get back
To rewrite the part where he left us
And leading me to leave you ever since
Healing our pain while accepting my eyes
Always will look for signs of life
For a way that he can come back
Even though we are convinced it can’t happen
Broken heart lets go back to start
Before you turned half and I lost life while living
Let’s go back to the start before He fell ill
Before he fell short of being what we needed
Let’s softening to the pain, falling back into being
I’m coming home now
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Heartlight Poetry 